Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Still A Bit Behind

I count four heads in this picture.

The crack in the cement is where they all live.

The only snake who was too small to leap out of the bucket.
Here are the pictures from last week.  We caught and petted a few more snakes on Saturday.  After this "census of live snakes" my mom would like a few removed from the property.  Anyone want a pet snake?

*****

I just gave away our baby swing.  Jessica is big enough that she can touch her toes to the floor and reach out and grab the front bar of the swing bringing herself to an abrupt stop and yanking on her arm.   I was actually selling a small nightstand on Craigslist and the young couple who came to look at it were obviously expecting a baby soon.  I had the thought 'they could use the swing more than I can' and I asked them if they would like it; they were very happy to take it. [ Glade says - Never Suppress A Generous Thought! ]  I got the swing for free almost eleven years ago from some friends who were upgrading to a different model, and it has been well used by my family as well; so I just gave it to the couple.  I felt really good about my spontaneous decision, but as they drove away with it I felt kind of like I was losing a friend.  While I stood there questioning my sanity and the possibility of baby stuff hoarding issues I really had to do some fast internal dialogue analysis.  I am handling the challenges of five kids.  I love all of my kids and I have years of work raising them still to come.  When I picture my future I see myself getting this bunch through many years of growth and development with good values and high standards.  I do not want to be pregnant or have a baby EVER again.  It's an amazing experience but it's such a huge trade off in the sacrifice of being horribly ill and pregnant then being a nursing mom who is constantly on call to provide the twenty-four hour nutrition service of a demanding baby.  It adds up to about twenty-two months of major commitment.  I could cut it back to six months of nursing and switch to bottles but I have chosen not to, and it's rewarding and demanding and wonderful and a challenge and bonding and bondage...  Anyway, it's not that I want my life back because this is my life, it's a good life and it's the one I have chosen, it's just that I want my life to move forward.  I'm always striving to improve and make myself a better person, this is what I feel is the purpose of life.  My kids have done amazing things for me in how I have grown and progressed in the journey and they continue to do so every day.  With five children I feel I have reached my potential, actually I felt that way with four children and Jessica is sort of an encore or bonus round.  I'm good, time to go on to the next stage.  That baby swing is just such a tangible symbol of the baby years.  From Krista on, it has quieted my fussy infants and reassured me with the soft mechanical whir of a battery powered motor.  Like the Toy Story 3 toys, it's moving on to love and sooth new children rather than head for an indefinite stay in some kind of storage limbo.  "I have been chosen! Farewell my friends! I go on to a better place!"

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